“First things first. The fruits of the Spirit scripture that we all know and love, most of the time. It is found in Galatians chapter 5 verses 22 and 23. I’m using NASB (New American Standard Bible) at the moment.”
22 …the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; …
Perhaps, self-control, has been my hardest issue in life. Controlling the tongue, controlling my anger, controlling my actions *control, control, control .. all these unchecked have uprooted myself out of situations, good and bad, and taken me to different locations in life. I’ve gotten a lot better over the years and after all I am getting older so I am slowing down a bit with wisdom. Thank God. For real. I never really been a fan of struggling the way I have chosen to (did I choose?) but it led me to check out my DNA through a DNA test site and read a lot about DNA and the ignited strands that I do have. I have the fight mechanism, not flight, in every instance of my DNA and it seems to me that this could be a precursor to not having that great of self-control. In a positive light, I got your back, get behind me. When my adrenaline pumps I feel nothing but the rush of heat and my mind quickens to that of life or death. This has triggered during bad times when it wasn’t needed and that has taken a toll on me over the years, not that I’m breaking down, but the consequences from it. I could blame society, blame people, or simply look at myself and train myself. At the very least, try to, and it has been something I’ve been hammering away at with a chisel ever since. It has been about 5 years now I would say before I started grasping this and I haven’t perfected it yet but it is a lot better. And I have learned a lot about myself since then like: I’m claustrophobic to the point of freaking out, cars, small rooms, crowded rooms, etc. However, when it comes to small planes that I’m about to jump out of I forget about being clastrophobic and just think about the jump instead.
Through that example I have learned that I can curve my feelings towards something no matter how great by thinking of doing something daring instead like, I don’t know, talking to strangers. Networking and enjoying life a little bit. Alcohol, although taboo in North American Christianity (for the most part), really helps cut the edge and lets me relax a lot. Guess what, I don’t care what other people have to say about what works for me, which didn’t always use to be the case. I have bent over backwards trying to please people most of my life which is also a form of no discipline or self-control. It makes us act erratic in thought processing when we force ourselves to do something outside our willingness just to ‘fit in’.
I got tired of fitting in because it just got me into more trouble then it would have have just to walk away. And I’ve been kicked out of my church internship so I know first hand what it is like to do everything someone else wanted you to do just to end in failure. Not only did I fail them in whatever way, I really failed myself because I didn’t have the self-control to tell someone no.
Understanding the difference between letting yourself bottle up just to explode and say no rather than simply saying no will take us great depths in life. Afterall, no one likes being around people who can’t control their emotions. It is a rough way to live and that is for sure. There are the sheep and there are the shepherds and if you are a shepherd trying to live the life of a sheep you will end up hurting yourself and those around you. I understand the sheep/shepherd thing hurts feelings but it is what it is and it was called what it was called. And for good reason.
Many are called, few are chosen. Could it be that shepherds want to fit in with sheep or that shepherds can’t control their emotions so it takes them out of the picture? I think so. I’ve definitely been called many times and prophesied over more than I can count but does that mean I was ever chosen? Nope. Why not? Because I had a hard time sticking up for what was right according to the Bible versus trying to please man constantly. Then, by the time I was done trying to please men I became so aggravated with myself that my cup became full of aggravation and spilled over. Not only do I feel as if I failed God, I failed myself and men trickled away as I left for the cave.
When you put self-control along with the other fruits of the Spirit you know where you should stand. Thank God for this scripture.